Textual Healing


What up, boos! Thank you all for sharing what makes your attitude take a 180*. What works for me will come as no surprise.

All I need when feeling down is a little textual healing. Sure, the other kind may be more popular, but this Valentine-less chiquita turns to more reliable methods. As soon as I finished writing yesterday’s post, I wondered whether the post was true anymore because I felt fine. Personally, I have to write it out. I have to turn the ugly into words. Then that’s all the emotions are– combined symbols made to represent words, made to represent emotions, made to represent what lies beneath.

Letting my inner monologue come out made for a chipper Tuesday. Though it was difficult to pry myself from toasty sheets, I told myself to just move forward. That’s all.

So I moved forward, directly into breakfast:

Koffee with pumproats.

In the pumproats (pumpkin+protein powder+oats): 1/3 C oats, 1 C water, 1 scoop Trader Joe’s chocolate whey protein, 1/3 C pumpkin, sprinkle of stevia, shake of cinnamon and a drizz of peanut butter. So delicious and batter-like.

One way to cope with a rut is to mix up one’s food choices. Currently, I’m being influenced by my supah protein-loving sistahs. High protein diets fascinate me mostly because they seem taxing, yet boast excellent results in toning. While I couldn’t imagine counting grams of protein (or calories or fat or carbs, for that matter), I will be trying to incorporate more into my diet. Then again, there is this vegan past of mine that knows absurd amounts of protein aren’t necessary for health. Then I think, “Yes, I want to be jacked.” Then, “OK, no, but we’ll see how it goes.” (Indecisive? Who, me?)

Protein-ed up, I trekked to class. Walking through the snow-covered ice was a workout in itself.

My mind was absent for most of Creative Non-Fiction. It wasn’t until Magazine that my brain was on fire. We talked about cover strategies for the magazines we’re creating, and naturally, I was thinking about SnackFace: The Mag. While the cover image itself is still being debated in my mind, I think I’ve come up with a tagline. What do you think?

SnackFace- Fashion with an appetite.

Totally cheesy? Totally fierce? I loved it at the time, but I never know.

What I do know, though, is that I was ready to get my SnackFace on when class was over. I trotted home and assembled a happy summer salad:

Flavors of Summer'09 right thurr.

Function before beauty. Or something like that.

In the salad: romaine, cucumber, celery, carrot, balls, cherry toms and the dressing that takes me back to San Fran:

I consumed bottles of this in the summer. Love.

Despite being transported to a sunny, warm place in my mind, my reality was the opposite. I pondered how I could view snow positively as I crunched this apple and stared at my car:

Middle man there. I cleared its snow, Popsicle-- no worries.

Alas, I had to forage through the treacherous snow to make it to Film. We watched The Conversation and I tried my best not to fall asleep. I snoozed for one minute, tops. I swear.

After class, I made my way home and made a delicious new-to-me snack:

Protein brownie batter.

I must admit that I was skeptical of April’s brownie batter. How could two scoops of protein powder, one scoop of peanut butter and some stevia taste like batter? And how could that small portion satiate my volume-eating preferences? Shoooo, child, that negative voice shut up as soon as I tasted this. Sweet, sticky, thick. (Ha.) It also took 10 minutes to finish, which I didn’t expect. I will make this again. And again.

With a burst of energy, I had an obnoxious Weezy-inspired, shades-of-stunna photo shoot:

Model stunna.

Supa stunna.

Sassy stunna.

Dear friends, I realize I may have lost many of you by now. I apologize for the SnackFace splooge.

Obviously feeling fierce, I let the energy carry into a 30-minute strength training session. I just erased sentences of nonsense descriptions because they were confusing. I can say, though, that my shoulders and toosh will be feeling it tomorrow.

Semi-hungry again, I got hopping on dinner. I’d been wanting a little Flatout pizza for a while:


After. Alright, it doesn't look all that different.

On the Flatout: 1 Laughing Cow French Onion wedge, about 2 T Dave’s Gourmet Butternut Squash pasta sauce, cherry toms, onion, spinach and tempeh. This baked in a 450* oven for 10 minutes and came out perfectly. What made it all come together was this beauty:

Dave, you're a good man.

MamaJ bought this gigantic jar at Costco, didn’t know what to do with it and pawned it off on me. Thank you, Mumsy! It lent a sweet, subtly savory flavor. Fabulous dinner:

Chillin' on a Target plate...that MamaJ bought. She's so bossy.

For dessert, I absolutely had to try the new Light n’ Fit:

Pineapple coconut, I want you all day, urrday.

Alone, it was chemically delicious. With cereal, it was gasmic:

TJ's Organic Morning Lite--like Smacks for fiber freaks.

I picked up Miss Muffin shortly after dining. We chatted, watched reality television, stalked…you know the drill.

Now that it’s 1am, I think I shall tuck away my clean laundry, wash the dishes and hit the hay. I’ve had plenty of textual healing for the night.

Ciao for now,


QUESTIONS: How much do you care about your protein intake? AND

What do you think of the tagline for hypothetical SnackFace Mag–Fashion with an appetite.

PS: This bit of Weezy news made my day. Thank you, Samantha!


69 Responses to “Textual Healing”

  1. My eyes are crossing but I had to say “holy squash batman!!!” Butternut pasta sauce. That my friend sounds freakishly delish. Bet your bottom dollar I will search out my local costco. Like tomorrow.
    Ps. Your a stunna, high protein or low.

  2. Love the tagline. Fashion and food, what more could you want?
    I’ve been trying to eat more protein. While I’m not a vegetarian, my meat-cooking skills are very (VERY) limited. I think I’ll try adding a scoop of chocolate whey to my oats tomorrow!

  3. Since I totally focused on the food (seems I need a beddy bye snack) I often go back and forth with the protein issue. My main focus is eat what you crave. Your body will do you good, yo!!

    The tagline is fierce, no doubt!

    Btw. Totally typing from my phone, please excuse the general typos!! Grammer, commas etc!!

  4. My mom told me she saw that sauce at Costco, and when I couldn’t find it at my Costco I had her buy it for me! I can’t wait to go home and get it from her 🙂

    Oh and OBSESSED with that dressing. Obsessed.

  5. “How could two scoops of protein powder, one scoop of peanut butter and some stevia taste like batter? And how could that small portion satiate my volume-eating preferences?”–
    Girl I have often wondered that about April’s genius creation and I need to get on it…b/c it’s such a little tiny quantity but it seems to just puff up into huge volume (twss!). Need it.

    Also the TJ’s peanut vinagrette…didnt even know bout that one. I’m all over it!


  6. I love the tagline 🙂

    And as for protein intake, the vegan in me says that it is definitely possible to live without counting protein grams, and I listen to that vegan 🙂

    xx Amy

  7. I’ve been diggin on the protein myself lately. You MUST try April’s cookie dough. I ate it twice today. Unlike you, though I do want to be jacked!!!

    Sorry I’ve been MIA. So. Danged. Busy!!!

  8. I love your tagline. Seriously. It’s perrrrrrfect!
    And Dave’s pasta sauce is the best thing ever :)!
    As for protein- I’m a protein FIEND, I crave protein rich foods constantly so I definitely get a fair amount of it between the HUMONGO amounts of greek yoghurt, chickpeas, lean meats, and nut butters I consume. I don’t count grams, but I’m pretty anal about making sure I have enough protein in each meal/snack- if I don’t, I just can’t feel satiated.

  9. I always play around with more protein vs. more fat and usually find that I just need a good balance like all things in life. An over (or under) abundance of anything is never good!

    LOVE the title – very cute. And it matches the fierceness of those photos, my dear! Lookin’ good. Is that sweatshirt j.crew? I think I recognize it 😉

    Much love to you! And thanks for the daily giggles and inspiration!

  10. 10 Michelle in Alaska

    LOVE your tag line, and I was thinking about it and thought maybe:
    SnackFace- Fashion with a healthy appetite. ?? Just cuz you eat pretty healthy 🙂

  11. I don’t count protein grams..but I am on a higher protein type of diet 🙂 It makes me feel better and less bloated!

  12. 12 Magdelene

    hmm, for me, too much protein makes my head hurt. i’m a carbs lover through and through, that’s for sure!

  13. 13 Little Bookworm

    I love the tagline for possible SnackFace Mag! 😀 That Flatout pizza looks amazing as well.

  14. I never understood the whole “all-protein” or “no=carb” or “no fat no calorie” diets. I say you are doing everything right! We need a balance of EVERYTHING in order to function 100%. So, if you feel you are lacking a bit in the protein department, it’s good to be mindful and to try to up it a little. Plus, eating cake batter seems like an excellent way to add more of this nutrient into your life. Think I will have to try it myself.

    Glad your week is going well. Your creative mind is always on fire! 🙂

  15. 15 Emily (Healthy Fit Mama)

    I’ve been hooked on protein powders since I read Body RX a few years back. I don’t follow the eating plan anymore (it doesn’t allow for nuts or nut butters!!), but I do still add extra protein wherever I can.

    Love the tagline! 😉

  16. SnackFace- Fashion with an appetite.

    totally fierce… go for it sista

  17. 17 Michaela

    Going protein crazy isn’t going to do anything. Once you satisfy your daily needs, your body can’t absorb any more protein.

  18. Pineapple coconut sounds delish! Have you ever tried the watermelon or cantelope Light N Fit flavors? They are sooooo good.

  19. I’m the same way about my protein! April’s creations always look amazing, but I’m used to eating mostly vegan. The brownie batter has gotten such rave reviews that I’m more and more tempted, though.

    SnackFace the mag just keeps getting better and better. I’m serious- you should pitch this idea! Judging by your amount of commenters, you’d already have quite the audience 🙂

    I have that J.Crew sweater/sweatshirt in green. So comfy!

  20. LOVE the tag line! Totally fierce!

    I, too, have been trying to up my protein intake a bit – I find it keeps me satisfied so much longer. Might have to pick up some new protein powders and give this famed brownie batter a shot 🙂

  21. YUMMMM! I feel like i eat a lot of protein- but i’ve been learningggg (holla nutrition 204!) that as long as we are eating the necessary amounts of carbs and fat, our body knows how and where to use the protein, aka most of us won’t get RIPPED from a few extra greek yogs 😀 So glad u had a fun weekend at home, I’m tryin to get outta here asap but snow is about to rain from the heavens, UGHHH…H
    hey! I have a question about singing/throat care on my blog if u wouldn’t mind giving your two cents!? Thanks lovie xxoo

  22. I make sure I get a source of protein at every meal and snack. I’m really focused on protein because it was missing in my diet during its ED phase. Fierce outfit chica!

  23. I always try to get in as much protein as possible, but I’m not obsessive about it. If I lack protein in one meal, I will just make up for it in the next. I love the look of that protein brownie batter though. 🙂 And tempeh on pizza sounds like the best thing ever!

  24. ah man, now you have me crave’n pizza. and i have no tortillas or flatouts. what’s a girl to do?

    i don’t really keep track of my protein, though I should being a veg head. i’m sure i’m getting enough in though (or i really hope!)

  25. 25 Gina G

    hey kailey! i dont have very good wise words about protein, i think i just eat what im craving! when im craving protein, i eat it. i think it kinda of all balances out in the end =)

    p.s. i loveeee your tagline!

    have a wonderful day!

  26. I love your posts! That vinagrette and pasta sauce sound ahhhmazing! And I love the fashion pictures – I need inspiration. I think the tagline is brilliant!

  27. Hey sugar!!
    you should try adding egg whites in your oats-its AMAZINGLY FLUFFY And an extra boost of protein!! i dont “count” my protein intake, but i make sure to have about 20 grams at each meal..i know thats a lot..but im lifting weights right now (GONA GET JACKED)
    aww i would SO spend v-day with you if i could! we could share my boyfriend! bahah. okay that may sound weird-didnt mean it to be weird!
    LOVE YOU K! you are so cute in that outfit for real!

  28. The bloggies have influenced me into upping my protein intake as well. I bought my first canister of powder and I’m ready to get pumped up! That brownie batter is in my future.

    I LOVEEEEE your tagline! It’s perf!! Where did you get that brown top from? It looks so familiar! I hope Muffin is feeling better 🙂

    Have a great Wednesday, pooks!!

  29. I don’t worry too much about protein. I consume enough Greek yogurt to keep these pythons loaded.

    And, well, I love the tagline mostly because it covers all the bases: clothing and consumables. You do both so well.

  30. I really don’t worry about my protein intake. Apparently we only need a little more than 45-50 grams a day, and most people have problems from too much protein intake, not too little. I do eat protein powders sometimes (I like that mine is like an Amazing Grass blend and has spirulina, barley, kale, and other green hippie substances so I see it as a vitamin supplement, too) but I think it’s not necessary to stress about adding it to every meal or anything. It seems to me that the most important part of a diet is lots of fruits and vegetables, but that’s the vegetarian in me talking!

    Love the SnackFace mag tagline!

  31. ahhh I love the tagline. You so awesome sauce!

    I feel ya on the protein thang. I know it’s not necessary per se, but I know I LOOK hotter when I up it, so I am at a crossroads…because I hate counting grams and kcals and stuffs as much as you do, me thinks. [run on sentence, what?!?!] Anyway, I totes get the urge to pump it up. GET JACKED!! [I love that, hahaha]

    And please can we plan a meet up/hang out soon? Fo reals? SF?

  32. I haven’t officially worked out since Friday since all I’ve been doing is trekking through mounds of snow. I’m surprisingly sore and have no problem with leaving the treadmill out of my life for a few days. Now that it’s in the single digits, though, I would love to sweat it out with a magazine and my iPod INSIDE.

    I’ll admit that I make a conscious effort to get tons of protein. I don’t really count, but I think I go for about 20 g/meal and like 10-15g/snack. I really have no idea though, but can’t complain since I’ve got myself a nice pair of guns. Not that I’m offering tickets or anything, but doing enough yoga definitely has its rewards!

  33. I care a lot about my protein but I don’t count the grams I get. I drink a whey protein shake immediately after work outs and try to incorporate protein into most of my meals. It’s filling and low in fat so I’m a firm believe in protein 🙂 I could never ever everrrr give up my carbs tho!

    glad to see some chemically goodness in the blog 😉

  34. I am officially sick of the snow!
    I care about protein since I’m a vegetarian, but typically only on days that I lift do I make a concious effort to get extra protein. I think it’s important, but I personally don’t need as much as others seem to need.

  35. 1. TOTALLY fierce.
    2. you’re TOTALLY beautiful
    3. I often find that after I write a post, I feel differently– it’s therapeutic writing!

    Stay warm darling!
    bec xo

  36. Sometimes I’m all about the protein and try to consume copious amounts and then other times I’m like protein shomtein… what do I care about how much of that.

    But really, for the most part I just try to get an adequate amount to keep me filling full.

  37. 37 Anne

    Um, I want that Costco sauce now – looks amazing!
    I don’t worry about my protein intake, unless you’re really killing it in working out – most Americans get plenty of protein goodness.

    Loving Snackface the magazine (love yours and here’s some alternates!)

    An Appetite for Fashion.
    Taking a bite out of Fashion.

  38. Love the tagline…Fashion with an Appetite! It has such positive undertones: a) fashion combined with food equals fierce and b) those in fashion DO eat and don’t starve themselves! Sounds positive and fab!

  39. 39 Katie

    Still lovin’ on your blog, sista. I have a love/hate relationship with Costco. I love that they have so much fabulous organics, produce and canned goods but hate how each Costco can carry such different amazing things! I SO have to find that pasta sauce!

    Smooch! Enjoy your hump day!

  40. Girl, if you had a magazine I would buy it. As long as there are gratuitous shots of stunna shades and peanut butter porn drizzle.

    Also, I would like to take a quick swim in that brownie batter, please.

  41. 41 Katie

    And I totally didn’t answer the question. I put protein powda in my smoothies and in my oatmeal. And I put nutritional yeast on salads and pastas.

  42. LOVE the tagline.

    LOVE the weezy photo shoot. everytime i hear him, i think of you and lo.

    LOVE the pizza. LOVE the sauce even more.

    LOVE the title of this post – so creatively fab.

    LOVE the salad, apple and b’fast.


    this post truly made me happy. sometimes i want to just be a crabby bitch and rant on my blog, but then hold back. WHY?!?! textual healing is totally therapy for me too. somehow, when i get it all on paper, it just doesn’t seem as bad anymore. i totes should have done this last night.

    have a great, fabulous day my love!!!

  43. 43 Nicole G

    I was in my car yesterday listening to the radio and I heard about Weezy and I thought of you! I knew you’d be thrilled LOL

    I totally understand what you mean about textual healing – cept for my its talking. Once I talk out loud about how I’m feeling its like a weight off my shoulders – in fact it makes me think I’m crazy sometimes because suddenly everything I was griping about seems to not exist LOL

    Nicole G

    PS. That pizza looks AMAZING!

  44. Nowadays I try to aviod things with, lets say 1g pro and >.5g fiber..
    I try and aim for MUCH higher numbers. I justfind that it keeps me fuller for alot longer.

    oh and Im likeing the tag line! let us know if you think of anythign else!

    xox Vera

  45. Babe I can totally relate to your protein dilemma. We are both hella tall and I think it can be very easy to fall victim to that model waify look…or at least strive for it. All I wanted was to be “skinny” for a long time. But, after the hubbie and I did the Body for Life Challenge (which was totally inspired by Miss Janetha) I realized that I loved lifting weights and building more muscle. To accomplish this I just HAD to eat more protein. I’m a carb ADDICT, but I find that I just dodn’t crave carbs all day long when I eat more protein.

    Anyway if you ever need some protein ideas holla atcha girl!

    p.s. Hello butternut squash pasta sauce…can we be friends?

  46. 46 Clare

    Ick, I think my brain would over load if I was constantly counting protein grams. So many better ways to spend my time – having said that I’ve just eaten a ton of Cadbury Mini Eggs and am eating carb-a-licious Chinese food later, so probably am not the best person to ask. I also giggled so much when I read “sweet, sticky, thick (my mind = a gutter). And yes to the tag line, I think its the right side of cheesy!

  47. LOVE that tagline! and I pay attention to my protein intake…but probs not as much as I should. Love the stunna shades…Weezy would be proud!

  48. Love the name of the mag and great idea on that protein! A girls gotta get that protein in somehow- I defs need to try aprils batter!!

  49. 49 lowandbhold

    I feel the same way about protein. I’m torn between thinking it’s all a bunch of hullabaloo to thinking I really need to amp it up. I’m currently amping, and I think I like it.

    Totally fierce girl, I say go with it.

  50. I just started eating meat again after three and a half years of being a vegetarian, and honestly I ddn’t notice any changes with more protein. I did find, though, that since I started eating more fat (animal and plant) a couple of weeks ago, my skin is better, I bruise less easily, and I sleep better. Fat is where it’s at (and you thought YOU were cheesy).

    Also, don’t sunglasses make winte so much easier to deal with?!? I think so.


  51. Wow, your pizza looks AMAZING!!!!! Once I can leave my snowed-in cabin, I’m making a trip to pizzaland…..aka Whole Foods for some delish ingredients.

    I looooove that dressing too! Have you tried TJ’s Goddess dressing? That’s my current obsession. I swear I could drink that stuff straight from the bottle! 😉

  52. Well, I don’t worry about my protein intake too much when I’m eating meat, but when I’m not I eat a lot of beans, nuts & nut butters and goat cheese!


  53. I’ve been dabbling with the idea of protein brownie/cookie batter for some time now, but like you, Ive hesitated for fear of needing the contents of an industrial sized jar of pb to satisfy my voluminous eating preferences. But now that you dove into the mess and it took you 10 min (im anticipating 5 min max for my own consumption) I think im gonna have to give ‘er a tryskies. That being said, I often spit substances described as “sweet, thick and sticky” (tmi?) haha, but ill try anything once, twss. Must introduce me to Dave, he sounds quite “pleasurable” indeed. Alright, enough of my teenage boy silliness. Killer eats, killer beats and killer outfits par usual, snack face.

  54. I blame the marvin gaye theme of your title for my abundance of sexual inuendos. thanks.

  55. 55 Mandee Lei

    I tried that protein brownie batter when I saw it on bodybuilding.com many years ago, only they like to call it sludge over there. I think I prefer the term brownier batter instead, sounds a bit more appealing! I spent a year with an ED and the year after I spent pumping weights and uping my cals/protein. I counted cals and grams of everything and found it triggered a lot of ED and OCD behaviors in me. Also when I was getting more than 1 serving of protein powder in a day my tummy did not feel right! I love protein but like a lot of other ladies are saying – balance is the key and being happy is #1. So do what feels right for you! I will say my favorite breakfast is oatmeal but I always add in 3 egg whites along with the natty PB of course. The egg whites are soooo good in the oatmeal!! And LOVE your tagline!

  56. Since Im meat and dairy free I def have to monitor my protein (UH but I never do). I eat a ton of tempeh, beans, and nuts so Im thinkin Im okay! 🙂

    Happy Wednesday to ya!!

  57. Brownie batter?! What in the wooooorrrrllllldddd?? Must try this tonite.

  58. looooooove the tagline.

    i always think about playing with my protein intake, simply to see if my body responds in any crazy way. i somehow suspect that protein powder and lots o egg whites wouldnt actually have much of an impact on how i feel/look, but i am muy curiosaaa. im down to make more of an effort to integrate it into mi dieta and see if i wake up with jillian michaels arms. that happens, right?

    glad you are feeling MEJOR, AMOR

  59. “fashion with an appetite” = PERFECT.

  60. LOVE the tagline 🙂 …seriously, how are you so darn clever??


  61. I’m glad you liked the batter! I never thought it would be filling but I love it!

    And you already know I’m a protein addict. 200 grams a day!

  62. 62 Stef @ moretolifethanlettuce

    i really want to try that butternut squash pasta sauce and the peanut vinaigrette !

  63. shoo, i never think about protein intake. probably should, but i get too damn lazy reading labels and figuring out the right amount for my body. i’ll get on it… one of these days.
    lost readers with that weezy shoot? only the ones that can’t hang! ahaha 🙂
    p.s. i LOVE the idea of a snackface magazine, and do not fret my friend, the tag line is fierce!

  64. OBSESSED with that tagline! And being a fan of making up taglines in general..I was wondering if you would consider incorporating this one into your life somewhere:
    “Snackface–because snacks are NOT just for kids”
    haha just came to me, what can i say, I’m gifted like that…

    Anywhooooo, smashing boots! I love your outfit pics!

  65. 65 Shelley (findinghappinessandhealth)

    oh i LOVE your post title- if only i could come up with such cute ones hehe 🙂 sooo ture- sometimes getting it out in writing makes such a difference!! poor weezy… he’ll be good though haha. glad you like the brownie batter protein stuff- it looks goooood to meee! cute pictures, as alwaysss. you’re gorgg


  66. 66 Nicky

    “Snackface: Fashion bites”!

  67. 68 Nicky

    You’re welcome!

    love from your very own UK-based freelance journalist 😉

  68. 69 Alyson

    Ok, I just call them pumpkin protein oats, but Pumproats is way cooler! :p And isn’t Brownie Batter fantastic?! I’m so glad we have another convert. I’m still constantly surprised by the magical things tasty protein powder can do!

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